Contemporary Retirement

I just couldn't decide what to write about in this, my final tip in the series. I felt a bit like the Queen must feel when she's writing her Christmas speech to the nation. Should I urge you to look back over the year and think about all your achievements with gratitude? Should I encourage you to look ahead and visualise everything that you want next year to be? What well-chosen words could I use to inspire you and leave you with a feeling of peace and well-being? And then, whilst I was trying to make my mind up, I did a quick check on my inbox and found the following:

Holiday Eating Tips

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.

posted by Annie Harrison  # 12:20 PM 0 comments

Whilst I was thinking about what to write for the ninth tip in this series, the monthly newsletter from Michael Myerscough of The Relationship Gym plopped into my inbox and I knew that the following excerpt was exactly what I needed. It's food for thought whilst you are getting together with family and friends over the holiday and, if, for some reason, you can't all get together this year, it's a reminder to find some other way to get in touch with your loved ones and let them know what they mean to you.

Who Loves You?

I’ve been trying to come up with a chirpy end of year article and I have to say it’s not working for me right now. I’m actually more focused on a eulogy that I’m writing for my Gran, Margaret Myerscough, who died last week. Her death marks the end of me having any grandparents and has come as a bit of a shock. I have to say that at the moment I’m experiencing regret about not having said all the things to her that I would have liked her to know. Whilst most of us were aware that she wasn’t very well it was assumed that my Gran would be around for another year or so. Well, last week she died peacefully in her sleep and moved on.

I make every effort to communicate how special people are in my life and let the people I love know that they are loved. In this case however I assumed that it wasn’t urgent and hadn’t been in touch for a while. I’m aware that there are a hundred and one times when we are reminded that life is a very fragile thing and that taking it for granted is a bit of a mistake. I just want to make it one hundred and two in the hope that in some way it might make a difference to your life.

It turns out that I’m reading the eulogy because I was one of her favourite grand children (I’m confident that none of the others are reading this so I can say that without hurting any feelings) and the sad part about that is that I had no idea. The thing that I’m getting around to here is that if you love people or even if people are just special to you it’s really, really important that you let them know. Don’t assume that they know, ever!

This is true with your partners, your parents, siblings, relatives, friends and just about anyone you share this planet with that you have any affection for. It makes all the difference in my world to know that there are people who love me, people that are proud of me or even people who just like hanging out with me or value my thinking. I also know that a lot of those feelings only became clear to me when I started telling others how important they are to me. For whatever reason a lot of us can get stuck in the idea that communicating love, in whatever form, is a bit of a burden for people that they’d rather not endure. Trust me on this one, it’s not true. Sure it might feel a little awkward and you might both feel a little shy, but every one loves a little love. It’s truly amazing the emotional doors that open when you start being honest with people.

posted by Annie Harrison  # 7:35 AM 0 comments

Habit 8 is: Make it special

So far, I have been making a big assumption that you will be surrounded by family and friends during the holiday season.

I was single and living alone for 7 years after my marriage ended, which meant that I often spent quite long periods alone over Christmas, so I know how isolating this can feel.

Are you facing your first Christmas as a single person? Have all the kids decided to hit the ski slopes for the holidays? Are you separated from your loved ones this Christmas? You probably already know all the old chestnuts such as 'Invite your elderly neighbours over for Christmas' or 'Help out one of the charities serving Christmas lunch to homeless people on Christmas Day'. In addition to these though, I would like to offer you the following ideas to help you make Christmas feel special this year:

1. Try to have something to look forward to every day of the holiday - something you really love to do but often don't have time for in your everyday life

2. Use the holiday to do something completely different - learn something new, give yourself a makeover or turn your home into a spa, so that you start the New Year looking and feeling fabulous

3. Do Christmas your own way. Use the opportunity to just please yourself for the whole of the holiday - do absolutely nothing that you don't want to do and include as many of the things that you DO want to do as possible - totally indulge yourself

4. Research a subject that fascinates you - start 2007 as an 'expert' (well maybe expert status is unlikely, but you could take several steps towards it)

5. Clear your clutter and start the New Year with a clean, clear, clutter-free space

6. Rent out all the funny films you can find and have an hilarious holiday

7. Aim to solve a problem you have been procrastinating over before the holiday is done

8. Plan a new life for 2007

9. Get a temporary job in a lively bar or restaurant for the holiday period - earn some extra money and be part of the festivities at the same time

10. Spend the time researching that business you've always wanted to start - the Internet never takes a holiday, so log on and find out how you could start a business on a budget, then, in the New Year, resolve to spend (at least) one evening each week working on your new business until it's up and running

posted by Annie Harrison  # 7:45 AM 0 comments

One daily habit that will leave you feeling less frazzled, exhausted and resentful at the end of the holiday is Habit 7:

Don't try to do everything yourself - even if you KNOW you can do it better than everyone else. Persuade, bribe, threaten and cajole everyone who is sharing the holiday with you into doing their bit too!

If all the family traditionally descends on you for Christmas lunch, this year, get them to bring a dish with them - a starter course, a desert, a contribution to the main course - whatever their speciality is. Get everyone involved - put the teens on duty preparing sandwiches and making sure drinks are topped up. Even littlies can take guests' coats upon their arrival or collect empty plates and glasses and bring them to the kitchen.

Put your son-in-law or nephew in charge of the annual post-Christmas-lunch game of charades and when anyone half-heartedly offers to take charge of washing the dishes, instead of insisting that they relax with everyone else and enjoy the fun, thank them heartily and point them in the direction of the kitchen...

posted by Annie Harrison  # 6:46 AM 0 comments

My sixth recommendation for a daily habit in the run-up to the holiday season is: speak up.

Are you the one that ends up 'doing Christmas' single-handedly? Does everyone descend on you on Christmas Day (or worse, for the whole of the holiday), breathe a sigh of relief, plonk themselves on the sofa and prepare to be waited on hand and foot for the rest of the time? Are you the unpaid servant? Catering to everyone's needs (literally)? Running yourself ragged? Collapsing into bed at the end of a long day, exhausted and wanting to pull the covers over your head and sleep for a week?

Well, speak up! Tell everyone that you're not prepared to do it again. Politely insist that they help out (more on this in Part 7). Get everyone involved and doing their bit. Just because Christmas has traditionally been 'done' a certain way doesn't mean that it always has to be that way - especially if it means a miserable Christmas for you. Break old traditions and make some new ones. Schedule some time for yourself. Don't end up unhappy and resentful this Christmas - you deserve to enjoy it too!

posted by Annie Harrison  # 7:32 AM 0 comments

During both the hectic period running up to the holidays and the holiday itself,

Even if you can only manage half an hour, take that time and spend it by yourself, doing something that you enjoy. Maybe you might earmark that time to have a long soak in the bath, curl up and read a good book, listen to a piece of music that calms or inspires you or just lie on your bed in total silence with the phone turned off and a 'do not disturb' sign on the door. You know what it is that you need to do to keep body and soul together!

posted by Annie Harrison  # 7:47 AM 0 comments

What 10 things could you do each day which would really make a difference to your health and wellbeing over the holiday season?

Many of you will already be well into the 'silly season' as far as eating, drinking and looking after your general health and well-being are concerned... office parties, get-togethers with friends, nights out on the town, sweets and chocolates everywhere you look...

Some of you will already know that, throughout the year, I advocate making a list of 10 habits that, when practised daily, will make you look and feel better. These are things like flossing your teeth or taking just 2 minutes to buff your nails so that they are strong, shiny and healthy-looking. Or maybe writing in a journal for 15 minutes.

Over the next 10 days, I am going to offer you 10 daily habits that you can practise both in the run-up to Christmas and over the holiday period which should help to combat some of the worst excesses associated with this time of year.

So here we go - Tip 1 -

What particular challenges does this time of year present for you? Do you have a sweet tooth and can't resist all the sweets and chocolates on offer? Do you snack and 'graze' on party food all day and never manage to eat a healthy meal until normality returns in January? Do you use the holiday season as an excuse to over-indulge, convincing yourself that you will soon lose all the excess weight in the New Year?

If any of the above sounds like you, at least give yourself a good start to each day by eating a healthy breakfast - even if all you can manage is a couple of pieces of fruit. If you can start your day with a full stomach and healthy blood-sugar levels, you will be less inclined to dive into the cookies and chocolates with your mid-morning cappuccino. Your waistline will thank you for it too! :-)

Come back tomorrow for Tip 2.

posted by Annie Harrison  # 7:52 AM 0 comments

If your parents are struggling to manage their financial affairs and you feel that you have reached the stage where you need to help out, have a look at the following article by Teri Cettina for Bankrate.com, which sets out an 8-step plan to guide you through the maze:
http://www.bankrate.com/dls/itax/news/20061124_8step_plan_parents_finances_a1.asp.

posted by Annie Harrison  # 7:54 AM 0 comments

It's not my idea of a romantic gift, but couples are now being given the opportunity to exchange rings made from their own bones. It's not quite as gruesome as it sounds - you don't actually have to remove any of your bones to make the ring. Bone cells are extracted from wisdom teeth and samples of bone are then grown in a laboratory. One lucky recipient of such a ring described it as being 'like ivory but more ethical'. If you're reading this and considering buying me jewellery, I think I'd prefer to stick to the more traditional gold and silver if you don't mind...

Read the full story here: http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/6215702.stm.

posted by Annie Harrison  # 7:45 AM 0 comments

Here's a timely article by Margaret Collins, one of the wealth coaches at The Money Gym. Their blog, http://www.wealthcoach.typepad.com/ is one of my favourites and always worth checking out.

Christmas can be many things - a great family occasion, a time to celebrate or something to endure. For many it is an opportunity - or an excuse to escape to sun or to snow.

With each Brit spending an astonishing £2,200.48 - that's the average spend over the festive season last year, it can also be a financial nightmare.

Cornhill Direct's survey of 4,000 people revealed that £693.05 a year is spent on presents for loved ones, £337.27 on presents for friends, whilst £45.45 on people such as neighbours, tradesman and the postman.

Now while it's great to be generous, a third of people go into debt for Christmas in a bid to make it the best year ever. Personally I have different definitions and aspirations for my best year yet!

Twenty per cent of people are still trying to clear the debt by March and 10% are still in debt by the next Christmas. Does this sound familiar???

We're also pretty good, on average, of eating and drinking our way into debt spending £269.48 on food and £180.24 on alcohol - that's a collective total of £449.72 a year but all within a couple of weeks! (Thank goodness nobody has yet calculated the calorific content of our consumption or I'd be really scared.)

I've no intention of "doing a Scrooge" here. In the middle of winter there are pretty good reasons for wanting to celebrate something and have a good time - just try to make sure you don't have to live with unpleasant consequences for months afterwards. Whether it's debt on the credit card or inches on your hips - it can be so easy to put on and so difficult to lose!

As sure as the sun rises at dawn, the sales will be upon us as retailers try desperately to part us from our money. By now you've missed the boat so far as shopping early goes so wait until you get the bargain. Shop online so as to get the best price - and be tempted less by the impulse buy. I can't imagine a friend worth having who would wish you going into debt to fund their flashy Christmas present.

If you're looking for something different why not try that ethical Christmas gift - a dozen ducks or two small goats can make a world of difference to a family in the developing world - really the difference between life and death - and you still get a really great card to give to your friend. (Apparently someone has used my Christmas gift to feed 30 schoolchildren???!!!)

Remember enlightened millionaires live in integrity - and still have fun.

Here's hoping you attract all you need and most of what you want!

Margaret can also be found at www.TheGrowthZone.com.

posted by Annie Harrison  # 8:21 AM 0 comments

Keep everyone spellbound during those family get-togethers. Levitate the grand-kids, push a cigarette or rolled-up bank note through a coin or cough up a playing card. Learn to do all this and more at http://www.squidoo.com/beginningmagic/. (And just think how useful the ability to levitate would be if you ran out of seats around the dinner table...)

posted by Annie Harrison  # 6:44 AM 0 comments